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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

The Things They Carried

So much has been said on "the facebook" about what my fellow teachers will and will not carry with them as they travel to the UAE. As I read through those bits and pieces of home that we strive to fit into the limited baggage we are allowed a few things come to mind.

The first is the novel The Things They Carried by Tim O'Brien. We too carry the tangible and the intangible with us. Some of deciding to take pets because of how much they mean to us, our children really. Or the pictures of things to remind us of home when all we see is sand and sun and maybe camels. I plan to bring the boulder people (a collection of rocks from the shores of Lake Superior {ask K about the boulder people}). A bottle of shells from the MANY trips to the beach. I am still debating on whether or not to add the fish bowl and the frog box, we are trying for the minimalist here.

But the it is the intangible that makes a mark that others may only sense when we read the posts and talk of the unknown future. The guilt of leaving the beloved pet behind, knowing that the goodbye may be the last one. The heartache of missing  myriad family functions and milestones. The elation of finally being free to travel to places once thought beyond our grasp. The worry of  the possibilities of what may be when we get there. I too have some of this in my baggage, more than I let on but it is there.

So we sort and we pack and we decide what is essential and what is discard-able. I think of the numerous times I have packed and moved and the enormous need to keep all of what I have because in some ways it defined me. Looking back I think it was fear of the unknown that kept me with my stuff. As I purge the belongings I have, I realize the stuff is just stuff. My memories, my friends, my family, they are what is important. 

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Back to a state of anticipation

So I had a little medical scare that had me thinking I would not get to make my planned move to Abu Dhabi. Fortunately it was just a false positive but it lead me to think about all the changes we are making and the impact they can have. We are literally selling everything and moving halfway around the world. We are taking a leap of faith that all will be okay, not perfect but different, interesting, learning experiences.

I am a huge what if person. So I have to try to put a positive spin on that. Let's see some Emily for that:


I dwell in Possibility--
A fairer House than Prose--
More numerous of Windows--
Superior--for Doors--

Of Chambers as the Cedars--
Impregnable of Eye--
And for an Everlasting Roof
The Gambrels of the Sky--

Of Visitors--the fairest--
For Occupation--This--
The spreading wide my narrow Hands
To gather Paradise--
~Emily Dickinson

So we move forward, embracing a minimalist lifestyle (except for the shoes dammit!). We look forward to the journey and trust in God that the destination will be there we it needs to be there. I think what I look forward to the most is time to be a couple, to learn again why we stay together, what makes us a good fit. K continues to amaze and infuriate me on a daily basis. In so many ways he is the boy I met 25 years ago. I look at him and my heart is full. And then of course I want to slap him because he opened his mouth. So we shall see!